Employee survey

Dear Management,

It's time for the annual survey. How nice. I will complete it, just as I do every year. I'm just not sure why I bother. It's not that I fear being discovered when I lambast you with my vitriolic rants -- the third party service that tabulates the results assures us that our answers truly are anonymous, and really considering my comments the last two years have been equally disdainful and dripping with sarcasm and it hasn't resulted in termination then I imagine they are being truthful -- it's more that despite my honest, always scathing, criticism, nothing changes. The complaints have been the same for three years in a row. It appears that you note the problems, and then just ignore them. So as I tabulate my disagrees and strongly disagrees and compare them to my agrees, I realize just how desperately unhappy I am here. And while blogging my discontent in no love letters is a lovely pasttime, it does not allow for positive growth. I think perhaps I'll make another suggestion this year that will likely get ignored -- better mental health benefits. It appears the majority of your employees will require it as they are continued to be walked over on your quest to be the laughable and forever unattainable "100 best places to work."

No love, but lots of apathy,

Me.

Dear Disgusting cow-orkers -

Okay that was just one giant mess of ew. My dear ladies, I did not appreciate going into the restroom this afternoon to discover your little present you left dangling down the side of the toilet bowl. Perhaps you need more fiber in your diet? Would you like some immodium? How about a paper towel to clean up your own mess?

That ... that was disgusting. No, don't worry. I cleaned up for you, because I have children and therefore am used to disgusting messes that they would refuse to clean. I just didn't think I'd have to do it HERE.

No love,